Praising Kids: Why Giving Them A Big Boost May Not Be For The Best

Every parent would want to have their kid grow up to be confident. However, while constantly praising them can be a boost to their young ego, it is not necessarily for the best -- especially in the long run. As Huffington Post noted, "praise motivates children to receive more praise."

Children and teenagers are actually very critical about themselves, so when you constantly praise them for being smart and talented when they know that there's someone smarter and more talented than they are, it will make them think that they're not talented at all and your praises a form of sympathy. It tears down their motivation and self-confidence instead.

Being praised constantly can also limit their potentials. Positive Parenting noted that for instance, when you praise them for being clever, they will neglect the work for them to get there. Instead, they will withdraw from class -- being "clever" as they would stop doing things that would make them appear less so in the eyes of others.

Of course, parents can't ignore their children's achievements either, no matter how small, so here are a few tips to praise them better:

Keep it real. Don't tell them they did a good job when they didn't. Studies showed that when kids (and teens) receive praise, they don't take it as a sign of doing well, but as a sign of their lack of ability, often reading it as sympathetic praise because they need extra encouragement.

Help them to a "growth mindset" by praising their process instead. For instance, instead of saying "you're really smart," say "you found a good way to that," or "you seem to understand this pretty well" or even praise their effort, "I can tell you put a lot of effort in practicing." That way, they know that they've done well, but that they still have room to grow and improve.

Stop praising them altogether and just give a positive comment, even something as simple as "You did it!" Research showed that kids can be immune to praise by developing higher and higher doses for them to be satisfied. Grown-ups can't keep praising them over and over either. So once the attention is gone, kids will decide to take a step back from doing an activity ever again.