How To Effectively Discipline A Child: Try A Combination Of Positive Parenting & Consequences

A recent study has shown that effective discipline tries a combination of positive parenting and consistent consequences, depending on what the toddler does.

Medical Daily reports that Oklahoma State University professor Dr. Robert Larzelere and team investigated the differences in the effectiveness of various disciplinary responses in toddlers.

"By investigating how the effectiveness of disciplinary responses vary by the type of noncompliance in toddlers, this study showed how to reconcile the contradictory recommendations of positive parenting and behavioral parent training with each other," said the researchers.

The study has been presented last month at the American Psychological Association's Annual Convention.

The researchers gathered parenting data from 102 participating mothers, who provided detailed descriptions of five occasions wherein they had to discipline their toddlers for behaviors such as hitting, whining, defiance, negotiating, or not listening.

After analyzing the data, the researchers found that the most effective disciplinary technique depended partly on the child's behavior, and the time that elapsed between the behavior and response.

Giving compromises was found to be the most effective immediate response regardless of what misbehavior the child has done. Second most effective for cases of mildly unpleasant behaviors like whining was reasoning, although it is not effective for cases of hitting and defiant behavior. For such behavior, stronger disciplinary responses such as timeouts or taking something away are found to be the most effective.

Over the long-term, however, a different pattern has been found. When given very frequently to defiant or violently behaving kids, compromise makes the child misbehave even more. Reasoning, although less effective immediately, was the most effective on defiant and violent kids over a longer time span. Strong punishments, such as timeouts, are also effective if used very moderately (less than 16 percent of the time).

"Parents need the full range of nonabusive disciplinary responses, although power assertive responses are less necessary for the most cooperative children," they add.

The Brown University Child and Adolescent Behavior Letter (CABL) adds that the APA has some suggestions for parental action, which include, but are not limited to the following:

For kids 3 years old and below:

- Constant supervision is needed;

- A clear and firm voice will be best used for stopping behavior; and

- Distracting them with other things will help.

For kids three to eight:

- Setting rules and behavior expectations will help;

- A clear and firm voice is to be used when giving commands;

- Refrain from using "when" and "then" as threats;

- Timeouts can be used to calm kids down, and time period given is dependent on age; and

- Natural consequences, such as not getting a new toy for breaking one, for bad behavior is best.