What Bullied Kids Want Their Parents To Know And Why They Can't Tell Mom Or Dad

By Amanda Moore, Parent Herald February 08, 04:00 am
Kids who are bullied do not usually open up to their parents and experts say it's a must for adults to initiate conversations about it.
(Photo : Win McNamee/Getty Images )

A group of children from the ages 10 to 16 sat down together with a counselor and their parents to discuss bullying. Nine kids participated in a session and all of them admitted to having been bullied in school but they couldn't tell their parents initially.

Most of the kids said that they hesitate to tell their parents because they feel shame or worry about a confrontation between the parent and the bully. Most of the kids also said they turn to their peers for support instead of seeking help from their mom or dad.

One girl, Ella, however, decided to come clean and told her mom, Shannon, with some reservation at first. "I don't want to bring it up because I guess I think you wouldn't understand," Ella told her mom, according to WZZM.

Shannon admitted that bullying today is far different from what kids experienced two decades ago, during Shannon's time in school. The kids might be right in saying that their parents might not understand them.

These days, apart from increased aggression and competition among school age kids, there's also the issue of cyberbullying and social media pressures. The children themselves agree that bullying in the current social landscape is harder to qualify and identify. According to experts via WFAA, most kids who have been bullied online choose to suffer in silence and only 11 percent tell their parents about it.

Apart from shame and worry, these kids fear of getting a scolding from their parents for the time they spend online. They are also concerned that their parents might remove their internet privileges, thus cutting their access to cyberspace.

"Young people essentially live their social lives online and in person," Dr. Marion Underwood said. "To them, there is no line between the online world and their social world."

Parents might struggle with beginning a conversation on bullying with their children and kids hesitate because moms and dads might react instead of listening first. The National Bullying Center, however, stated that it's imperative for parents to initiate a talk especially if they notice their children's change in behavior. Early detection and intervention can prevent untoward incidents, the worst of which is suicide among young children due to bullying.

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