Due to COVID-19 Fears: Husband Not Allowed to Be by His Wife's Bedside While She Undergoes a Medical Abortion

An expectant mom had to undergo medical abortion alone, as her husband was banned from her bedside due to health safety concerns.

Mrs. Kemsley has endometriosis, a painful disorder in which tissue that normally lines the inside of the uterus grows outside it. Left untreated, endometriosis can lead to infertility or subfertility, apart from other painful symptoms. And due to her condition, the couple had to find another way to conceive.

The had to spend for six round of IVF to conceive

Emma Kemsley and her husband James spent £55,000 for six rounds of IVF to help her conceive. They were able to raise the money with the help of their family, personal savings, and an inheritance. Then earlier this year, the couple learned that they were pregnant. 

The Daily Mail report noted that James was, however, not allowed to attend a scan arranged for the baby due to COVID-19 restrictions. The scan revealed that the baby's bladder appears larger than it is expected. Mrs. Kemsley was advised to go back to the hospital to further check.

The Addenbrooke's Hospital in Cambridge then confirmed that the baby's lungs are blocking its bladder and that its kidneys and heart were not developing properly. The sonographer explained that the unborn baby has a slim chance of surviving. Mrs. Kemsley said she was given an abortion clinic's number to call and arrange an appointment.

The husband had to wait in a car park, while the wife was alone during the procedure

Mrs. Kemslely had to call her husband, who was sitting in a car park waiting for her, to break the news that she needed to terminate the pregnancy. Speaking to Daily Mail, Mrs. Kimsley said that the hospital had basically washed their hands of her. She said that they are clinical in their language and she was left to sort it out herself. Because her husband was outside, waiting in the car park, she felt completely alone.

For two weeks the couple tried to make an appointment but failed because her endometriosis and the stage of her pregnancy make the procedure complicated. Thus, they went back to Addenbrooke's Hospital and was then referred to a specialist at Homerton University Hospital. However, Mr. Kemsley was also not allowed to be by her side during the 15-minute procedure. 

"It's his baby too"

Mr. Kemsley said he should have been by her wife's side and supporting her throughout the process. "It is his baby too," Emma added, "he deserves to be there." She also recalled that she was so scared and felt so alone that time. The traumatic experience forced the couple to speak out and call for more support for fathers, especially for those who have lost their child because of medical abortion.

When asked for comment, the head of midwifery at Addenbrooke's Hospital, Amanda Rowley,  said the hospital tries to handles such restrictions as sensitive and as compassionate as possible. They are deeply sorry, Rowley added, that the care provided by the hospital fell below the standards they set for themselves.

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