Is It Okay for Parents To Tell Their Children To Follow Their Dreams?

Kim Brown Reiner Joan Maya Mazelis David Ankin dream Susan Newman

By Camille Hutchison , Parent Herald Sep 07, 08:38 am

Kim Brown Reiner, author and contributor of TODAY, said that when she asked her children what their dreams were, her first-grade son told her he wanted to become a world-famous movie director while her daughter wanted to be Taylor Swift.

On the one hand, she wants to tell them to work hard so they can be anything they want to be and follow their dreams. But on the other hand, she wants to tell her children to get a job, study, and get a good pension within 60 years. She sometimes couldn't avoid comparing her situation with her parents to the one she's having with her children now. Her parents were both teachers, and the setup worked out for her and her siblings.

Looking back, Reiner wanted to be a movie star when she was young. YouTube and other social media platforms were not invented yet, but even if they were, it still wouldn't work out as not everyone had access to such platforms. She realized she almost did everything to achieve her goals, but she still ended up as someone she didn't even think of becoming when she was young.

Do the words "follow your dreams" apply to everyone?

Joan Maya Mazelis, Ph.D. assistant professor of sociology at Rutgers University who teaches and researches inequality in the United States, said that hard work is essential, especially for those born into families without social and financial advantages. Children born financially unstable will find achieving goals and dreams difficult as they cannot support themselves or have anyone in the family, particularly their parents, to support them with their financial needs.

Kids from the lower sector will struggle more considering their situation; thus, following dreams will not be applicable.

David Ankin, inventor and star of hit show ToyMakerz, reminds parents to help their children understand that people have everything they are passionate about. If they think they have a calling, they must do something about it, and not just turn their back on them. Instead, they should work hard, per Diversity in Steam.

Susan Newman, Ph.D., a social psychologist and author of 15 books, said that it is a smart idea to help children understand that there are people who will appear smarter than them and more talented, but that doesn't necessarily mean they should give up. If she were to give her child advice, it would basically explain to them that they may never know where a certain connection might lead them and encourage them to meet new people and expand their network. This means that if they are not financially stable, they should work harder and not compare themselves to children born with golden spoons in their mouths. These things should not discourage them; instead, they should work harder and get to know more people.

Telling kids to follow their dreams can also be dangerous

Adults have different perspectives from how children see their dreams. For grown-ups, dreams are potential opportunities missed because circumstances and society hinder them from achieving them. Adults are expressive by nature.

Telling someone, specifically kids, to follow their dreams could have disadvantages. Dreams remain fantastical unless they are already achieved and carefully cultivated, Teachwire says.