Parents who have defiant children may have the same struggle and question in mind: and that is how to handle them. Defiant children can be quite a handful at one point or another for parents, and it's definitely a struggle for most of them.

Children who are defiant is normal and common. Defiance is common in toddlers ages up to grade school age. It is normal in a child's development that they show different behaviors, attitudes, and personalities.

For some parents, it is rude for a child to talk back or being disobedient to everything that they say, but parents should take a look at a bigger picture and understand that it is part of their developmental growth as a person. 

Defiance may show most likely when your child is in school age. Signs of defiance may be in any form, just like arguing with everything that you say or instruct them. Sometimes, it comes in the form of them getting a full tantrum.

Tantrums mostly occur to younger children since they do not know how to argue with you yet. Sometimes, your child may be showing a sign of defiance when they want to be in control and they are asking for their independence, or maybe they are just trying to test their limits and your authority.

Whichever it may be, it is important for parents to understand defiance in children for them to manage it more responsibly and not worsen the situation. 

Misconceptions of Defiance

Parents need to be more understanding of their children at all times, especially when they are showing signs of defiance. However, there are actions by children that are mistakenly taken as defiance, and this is what parents need to distinguish properly.

There might be times that your child is lingering because they are too focused on the activity that they are doing, and you would think something is wrong with them, even if they're just being normal. As parents, you need to look into more of why your child is lingering and address the problem immediately.

On another perspective, there are defiant behaviors that happen for a long period of time and hinders a child's performance at school or even their relationship with their parents and family members. This is another type of defiance that is more known to as the oppositional defiant disorder, or ODD.

Children who have ODD has certain behaviors such as temper tantrums and aggressive behavior that may not be suitable or appropriate to their age. ODD may also show other worse problems such as depression, ADHD, or anxiety. If you happen to notice such signs of ODD in your child, it is best to bring them to your doctor and get help from ODD support groups in your area.

Managing Defiance in Children

Although it may be hard to imagine that handling a defiant child could be possible, here are some tips that you can use to manage them:

• Always find out what's behind their behavior

• Train your child to possess good behavior

• Treat your child the way you want to be treated as well

• Use your kid's verbal skills to your and their advantage

• Make and set ground rules

• Compromise with what they want

• Be open with them by giving them options 

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