Telling Kids They Can't Sing Could Hurt Them Later In Life, Here's Why

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According to professor of music education at Northwestern University, Steven M. Demorest, all kids are born to sing, and telling them that they lack the talent to do so can have lasting negative effects. 

Demorest explained in a recent essay that the research shows that a lot of adults who think of themselves as unmusical were told as kids that they could not or should not sing by their former teachers and their family members. He said that his research found that if kids have a negative view of themselves as signers, they are much less likely to participate in music of any kind. These kinds of perception of a lack of musical talent can then come true once they grow up. 

That is not all, he also went on to explain that adults who drop out of music as kids may lose their singing skill through lack of opportunity and use. And children who love music but do not think of themselves as musical could miss out on a lot of the social and cognitive benefits of music participation, as well as the experience of being connected to other people through music. 

He also wrote that these benefits have nothing to do with talent. Kids are natural musicians, as they readily dance, sing and play music from the time they are babies. People ask me all the time how they can tell if their kid has musical talent. He assures them that their child has musical ability that can be developed into a lifelong and satisfying relationship with music. But as the kids get older, some of them begin to get messages from family members, peers, the media and music teachers that they may not be musical and that they do not have the talent. 

Effects of Talent Shows

It is a sad reality, and shows like "American Idol" does not help either. Talent shows promote the perception that singing is just a rare ability reserved for the talented few, and that those without a singing talent entertain us by being weeded out and ridiculed. 

Demorest said that this talent mindset of music runs counter to what psychologist Carol Dweck calls the growth mindset that is considered critical for learning. Students who view their success as a result of their hard work will persevere through any challenges that they face in life, while those students who believe their success lies with some innate ability, like talent, has a higher chance to give up. 

How to send positive messages to children about singing?

Demorest says that the change could begin both at home and school. He also offers that if you are a parent, you could sing the music that you loved growing up and you should not worry about how good you sound. Having an adults in the home committed to singing and music without shame may be the most powerful influence on your kid. You could also sing with your kids from the time that they are little, sing with the radio, sing at the dinner table or sing in the car. 

For fellow music teachers, Demorest asked that teachers should encourage all kids in schools, in classrooms and communities to sing whenever and wherever they get a chance. The sad reality is, when musical experts discourage a child from singing, it can deliver a fatal blow to the kid's musical self-image.

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