Age-Approriate Ways of Explaining Sex to Kids

As kids are naturally curious and love asking questions, there will come a time when sex is going to be one of the topics they will be asking.

Parents have different approaches to answering these questions. Some prefer to give vague answers, while others change the topic when they can.

However, experts say that there are age-appropriate ways of answering the questions of children. Besides, the kind of questions about sex that they will be bringing up will also depend on how old they are.

According to Cory Silverberg, a sex educator, in an article published in Today's Parent, the first step in answering questions about sex from children is to clarify from them. Parents should ask their children where they heard that word or idea. That way, parents can also respond appropriately to the questions.

For Kids Age Two and Below

At an early age, Silverberg believes that teaching children the proper names of genitals in starting the process of talking about sex.

During bath time, parents may teach their children the correct names of their genitals. Using the words penis, vagina, clitoris, bum, and nipples should not be awkward for parents as this is also a way to make sure that they can properly communicate health issues or injuries.

Another sex educator, Nadine Thornhill, explained with Today's Parents who notice their children tending to touch their genitals (which is normal), should also explain to their children that this should be done in private.

For Kids Ages Two to Five

This time for children is crucial for them to understand the importance of boundaries. Specifically, parents should be able to tackle the importance of knowing when it is not appropriate to touch or to be touched by other people.

When children learn the importance of knowing boundaries, it keeps them safe at the same time. 

During this time, kids may also start asking about how babies are made. Thornhill says that the details would depend on how much children can comprehend. Silverberg suggests saying it this way, "Two grown-ups get their bodies together and share the sperm and the egg to make a child like you, or sometimes they get the sperm or egg from someone else."

The key here, according to both experts is not to lie to children.

For Kids Who Are in Elementary

When kids are around six to eight years old, they can already ask questions that tend to be more elaborate than when they are younger.

Based on the experiences of some parents, this can be profusely sweating and nerve-racking. However, the way parents answer these questions may have repercussions. Nevertheless, experts say that honesty during this time will still come a long way. For some, less is more, that is why it is only best to offer adequate information. More than what is necessary might just confuse children.

Since this is the age when kids start to explore their bodies, topics like masturbation may be addressed. Parents may explain this as something normal but with a reminder that it should be done in private. Proper hygiene should also be discussed at this point.

Experts also suggest that topics like sex abuse are explained to children at this age.