Parenting is one thing, but co-parenting is way more challenging. Knowing how to ease parenting situations can be a way to make things a little easier for parents who just went through a divorce.
Because your children's situation is the next question, parents are sometimes caught trying to know how to ease parenting situations.
In her article on Psychology Today, Dr. Elizabeth Cohen reminded parents that although divorce affects the children, it does not mean that their lives are ruined because of the divorce.
Dr. Cohen explained how to ease co-parenting situations and how to connect to children while co-parenting. Here are some of her suggestions in specific situations:
Validate your child's perceptions.
Whenever your child notices that you are sad and asks you if you are okay, the best way to ease this situation is to acknowledge that your child noticed your feelings.
When your child asks you, "Are you okay?" Dr. Cohen says that the best way to answer your child is by saying, "Thank you for noticing. I am having a hard day/moment right now. I know this will pass but right now it feels painful. How are you feeling today?"
Cohen also reminds parents that short answers of denial will not do them any good.
Take time to process your feelings.
If you suddenly snapped at your child when there is something else going on in your life, Dr. Cohen says that the best way to address and ease this kind of tension is by taking a break. When you are feeling a little calmer, you may start talking to your child and say, "I love you even when I am angry. How about we go draw together?"
READ ALSO: 5 Usual Reasons Why Couples Get Divorced
You must reconnect with your child, you can do so by asking your child to do something with you.
Dr. Cohen says that parents should not give children any kind of confusion when they speak after snapping, like by shifting to a different kind of emotion. Taking a step back and calming your nerves should do the trick.
Just like parenting, co-parenting should be considered as a moment-to-moment experience. That is why Dr. Cohen says that connecting with children is very important.
Aside from these, parents could make co-parenting work by following some of these tips:
- Do not put the children in the middle of any argument or situation. When settling an argument, it would be best if kids are not the messengers or if they are aware of the issues that their parents have.
- Communicate with the co-parent. This way, arguments will be lessened and you are both aware of what is happening in your lives that may affect your children.
© 2021 ParentHerald.com All rights reserved. Do not reproduce without permission.