What Is Gentle Parenting? Is It Possible To Do It in Everyday Family Life

Gentle parenting is making a lot of noise these days in the parenting world. Tagged as the most loving way to parent children, many are curious and want to learn its ways and strategies.

Parenting expert and author of "The Gentle Parenting Book," Sarah Ockwell-Smith, has made it easy for parents to understand what gentle parenting is. She summarized it in three words - empathy, understanding, and respect.

This parenting approach prioritizes and encourages a deep, beautiful partnership between parent and child. It is making choices together and allowing the child to make choices not out of external pressure but "internal willingness."

Gentle parenting allows parents to become aware of the behaviors, actions, and responses they model to their children. It stimulates and encourages compassion, welcomes emotions lovingly, and expresses acceptance of the child as a whole, capable human being.

Is gentle parenting too good to be true?

As much as parents would want to learn and adapt the ways and strategies of this parenting method, a lot are asking if it's just too good to hear and read about it.

Is gentle parenting too good to be true? Is it possible to do?

Natalia Oliver, a classroom educator-turned content writer and copywriter, answered that gentle parenting could be done. It could be incorporated into parent's everyday life with their kids.

In an article she wrote for Guidepost Montessori, she provided tips on how to do this.

1. Comment on the action, not the person.

Parents should always try to see the child's actions as independent of the child. "It's the difference between responding with 'You're mean to your sister' and replacing it with 'I don't think your sister likes it when you do that. Let's try something else and see how she responds,'" Oliver suggested.

This will teach the children that mistakes happen to everyone and does not define who they are or who they will be. Teach them that committing mistakes is natural and that there should be no shame in it.

2. Model all kinds of kindness.

Remember that children are like sponges. They are observant and will likely mimic or follow what they see. Thus, parents should use this knowledge to their advantage. They should show kindness, not only to others but towards themselves as well, to teach their children that it is ok to be kind to one's self, that self-care is important. Show children how they should treat themselves; ultimately, they will learn how to treat others.

3. Invitation over demand to do work together.

This would have to be the simplest tip of all. Parents should change the format of their demands to a question that will encourage the child to work collaboratively with them. "Tie your shoes" can be transformed to "Should we tie our shoes so we don't trip?"

4. Encourage positive action.

Parents should learn that there are numerous alternatives to saying no. Oliver explained, "Gentle parenting means you choose to set clear boundaries and underline what you are asking of your child. Limit your request to focus on the action you do want to encourage."

Read Also: Can Gentle Parenting Make You A Better Parent?

Your child does not only sees you but watches you

Parents should see gentle parenting as a practice of keeping in mind "certain intuitive truths," like what was stated above - children learn by watching their parents. This is called observational learning. Thus, modeling the proper behavior is essential in gentle parenting, especially since modeling behavior has long-lasting effects on children.

In the long run, it is not only the child that is the learner in gentle parenting. Parents become students as well, realizing and learning that for their children to become good human beings, they should be one first. They should be able to model that goodness to their children.

Related Article: 3 Gentle Parenting Benefits That Will Make A Difference In You And Your Child's Life