If you're a parent who's ever found yourself eating cookies in the pantry or grabbing fast food on the way home from soccer practice, you're not alone. This habit has a name: revenge eating or "revenge meals."
It's a growing trend where parents sneak treats and indulgent foods away from their kids' watchful eyes. But what exactly is revenge eating, and is it something that helps or hurts your family?
Revenge meals happen when parents eat what they want, when they want, without having to share or set an example for their children. After spending the day making healthy lunches, cutting up fruit, and saying "no" to constant snack requests, many parents feel like they've earned the right to enjoy their favorite foods in peace.
Whether it's hiding chocolate in a secret cabinet or hitting the drive-through between errands, these moments offer a sense of control and personal choice during a day that often feels overwhelming.
Why Parents Turn to Secret Snacks
The appeal of revenge eating comes down to autonomy and self-care. Parents spend so much time focused on their children's needs that they often forget about their own. According to a recent Parents Food Study, 80% of parents put their children's health before their own.
This means preparing nutritious meals for the kids while grabbing whatever is quick and easy for themselves, or nothing at all. By the time the children are in bed or occupied, parents finally have a moment to themselves, and that moment often involves food.
Revenge meals also provide a judgment-free zone. Parents don't have to explain their food choices or share their treats. They can eat what they want without worrying about setting the "right" example. For many, this feels like a small rebellion against the exhausting demands of parenting.
Is It Healthy for Your Family?
The answer depends on how often it happens and why. Occasional secret snacking is perfectly fine and can even be a form of self-care. Just like taking a bubble bath or watching your favorite show, enjoying some ice cream after bedtime can help you unwind.
The problem arises when revenge eating becomes a regular substitute for balanced meals or when feelings of shame accompany these snacks. If you're skipping proper meals during the day and relying on secret snacks to fill the gap, it may signal a bigger issue with self-care.
Experts agree that parents deserve to enjoy treats without guilt. You don't always have to hide your snacks. Eating openly and explaining your choices to your children can teach them that adults can enjoy special foods as part of a balanced diet.
Remember, taking care of yourself, including enjoying the foods you love, makes you a better parent. So go ahead and have that secret treat, but don't forget to take care of yourself throughout the day, too.
