Parenting Styles: Is Consultant Parenting The Key To Determine A Child’s Success?

By Charlize Walters, Parent Herald March 20, 08:03 am

It is already a known fact that parenting styles affect the children. When it comes to successful parenting, some experts believe consultant parents are the most successful ones.

Could parenting styles really determine a child's success? In a recent report, writers Beth Wendler and Heather Martyn of For Steamboat Today (via Craig Daily Press) highlighted the importance of self-efficacy, which they defined as the ability to understand one's personal abilities.

Even though self-esteem, along with the perceptions of self-worth, were the trend in the '90s, Wendler and Martyn revealed self-efficacy has become a vital tool in determining a child's success today. They added the sense of self-efficacy comes from consultant parents, who "tries to reflect most of the decisions and responsibility to the child."

Considered the most successful approach in child-rearing, consultant parenting makes the old adage, "actions speak louder than words" true as it allows parents to let natural consequences serve as "the teacher." By using more actions and few words, the children have the freedom to figure things out on their own.

In addition, consultant parents allow their kids to go through the natural highs and lows of life. Unlike helicopter parents and drill sergeant parents, who make all the decisions and direct the lives of their children, several teenagers feel empty and are not well-equipped with practical skills essential for surviving the harsh realities of life.

Children with drill sergeant parents also have pain and humiliation as their teacher. Kids with helicopter parents, on the other hand, often end up with low personal worth and a lot of weaknesses.

Despite the negative effects of various parenting styles to kids, Wendler and Martyn stressed parents should be educated with the proper technique and guidance, as well as ensure they provide their children with autonomy as this is the most significant task of childhood and adolescence. They also added that there are also times when parents need to intervene.

Meanwhile, another parenting approach known as gentle parenting has recently made headlines. According to Samantha Darby of Romper, gentle parenting allow parents to use more intuition than following the rules of the so-called "parenting manual."

Often confused with attachment parenting, parenting expert Sarah Ockwell-Smith differentiated gentle parenting as "more of a way of 'being'" than following specific guidelines. "The Gentle Parenting Book" author also summed up this parenting approach into three words - understanding, empathy and respect.

Do you think consultant parenting is the key to determine a child's success? Sound off in the comments section below.

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